I want to share a true story with you I heard long ago. I wish I could remember the name of the man whose account this is but time has erased that information. Here’s his story:
My parents were first generation immigrants from a little village in Scotland called Drumnadrochit. While you’ve probably never heard of the village, you’ve certainly heard of the lake lying beside it - Loch Ness.
Just as my parents were first generation immigrants, I grew up as a first generation American. We lived in New York, near the city, and I continue to reside there until this day. Sadly, my parents have both now passed.
All my life I was regaled with stories from Mom and Dad about their beloved Scottish Highlands. They painted so many beautiful pictures in my mind over the years that it seemed to me their memories were my own.
As a young boy my favorite stories revolved around the Highland shepherds and their sheep.
I told myself back then that one day, when I was all grown up, I would take a trip to Scotland and see it all for myself. I wanted to experience the land of my roots, the country my parents so dearly loved.
In 1979 I decided the time was right. I was heading to Scotland! My only regret was that with my parents now dead for a number of years, I would not be able to share my experience with them once I returned.
I flew in to Edinburgh from New York and spent the day exploring that notable city.
The next day I boarded a travel coach for a day trip through the Highlands. Something happened on that day that easily ranks it as the most memorable experience of my life.
Our coach driver pulled into a lay-by to allow us to view one of the Highland’s many postcard-worthy sites... a Scottish shepherd with his dogs and flock. I was excited about this because it was a site I had been waiting my entire life to see.
I’ll never forget what happened next. What I saw absolutely astonished me.
In front of me, I saw one of those storied shepherd scenes. But something wasn’t right. As a matter of fact, nothing was right!
Instead of a languid, gentle scene, what I saw could only be described as pure chaos. Instead of gently moving the sheep about with his crook (staff), the shepherd was sweeping it in a circle over his head and yelping. He looked like an angry whirling dervish!
Those disciplined, obedient sheep dogs? If there was any sense to what they were doing I certainly couldn’t see it! The dogs were running all around the sheep, barking, nipping at their heels.
And as for the sheep - they were freaked out! They were bleating and jumping and running in all directions, obviously filled with fear.
This scene was a mess! Further, it bore no similarity in any shape or fashion to the stories I grew up with - stories told to me by my beloved mom and dad!
To say my mind was blown is an understatement. I was utterly confused. Rattled as I was, I tracked down the driver and asked him if he could explain what I saw.
The driver’s response only added to my confusion. He just looked calmly at the scene then turned to me and said, “Uh-huh, what’s the problem?”
WHAT’S THE PROBLEM?!! I said.
I then explained how my parents were Scottish immigrants to America and how they had told me my whole life about the loving Scottish shepherd and the care he bestows upon his sheep.
As I pointed to the scene before us I said, “THAT’S THE PROBLEM! That’s the craziest bit of chaos I’ve ever seen and I don’t know what in the world is going on!”
The driver started to laugh. Now I’m not only confused and frustrated... I’m a little angry.
He must have sensed my mood because he quickly said, “I’m sorry. Let me explain.” And in two brief sentences he cleared up the entire fiasco for me.
“That’s not the shepherd tending his sheep. That’s the butcher rounding them up for the slaughterhouse.”
It perhaps seems obvious for the believer that the shepherd in the story is Jesus and the butcher is “our adversary the devil,” as Peter refers to him (1 Peter 5:8).
We might call this the spiritual application of the story... and it certainly is a valid one.
But this is not the application I typically use with my therapy and counseling clients.
When it comes to our inner life, it helps to remember that two strands braid together – the spiritual and the psychological, the universal and the personal.
And I typically use this story to illustrate the psychological butcher voice each of us carries within us... a personalized tormentor that works in our minds.
This butcher voice almost always has its roots in our developmental years. For example, I was being interviewed on a radio station when my book Shadow Work came out. The host of that program (quite courageously) shared with me and the listening audience the story of how his first-grade teacher called him “stupid” when he answered a question wrongly. The full class erupted in laughter. The host shared how that to this day he would hear a voice whispering to him that he is “stupid” whenever he makes a mistake.
That’s the butcher.
Do you know the sound of your own butcher voice?
It may be that of a censorius parent from long ago. It might be the voice of elementary school peers who mocked you for a weakness or flaw.
Whatever its origins, rest assured... you have a butcher voice (unless you are a narcissist – then you have a bigger problem).
That said, let me suggest some practical steps that will help:
1. Learn to recognize your butcher voice.
2. Come to identify the errors or lies it whispers to you. For example, if your butcher voice tells you “you never do anything right,” that is an obvious exaggerated lie.
3. Challenge the exaggeration or lie. You do not have to embrace the butcher’s message!
4. Replace that message with a true statement (this is where Scripture can be a priceless aid).
5. Behave the truthful statement. For example, you can’t replace a butcher statement like “I’m a failure” with I am “more than a conqueror” in Christ (Romans 8:37) and expect to feel better if you go forward walking with your shoulders slumped and speaking barely above a whisper. That will never work.
6. Cultivate your psychological shepherd voice. Hold yourself accountable, don’t make excuses... but do so in love. That’s what a loving shepherd does.
If you’d like some help working through these steps, please reach out and let us know. That’s what we’re here for.
Til next time,
